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I recently re-read the book Above and Beyond: A History of the Medal of Honor from the Civil War to Vietnam by the editors of  Boston Publishing Company (1985). It contains the stories of sixty-five recipients of the Medal of Honor. These men stared down the angel of death and ignored all concern for their own safety in service to our country. Their stories and demonstrations of courage brought tears to my eyes. These were men from every walk of life that, when confronted with almost certain death or the death of others, chose to act with complete disregard for their own life and safety to defend others.

As I turned the pages, I focused on their courage. Depending on the source, courage can be defined in several ways. Webster’s New Collegiate Dictionary defines courage as, “the mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty.” However, for our purpose, I believe a more accurate definition rests with the ancient philosopher Aristotle who said, “A truly courageous person is not someone who never feels fear, but who fears the right thing, at the right time, in the right way.”

The stories in Above and Beyond were not those of men who never felt fear. For these men, I believe fear played a different role than it did for others. These men did not fear what someone or something might do to them. Rather, they feared failure of living up to their values; re-acting instead of acting, not taking full advantage of opportunities, or placing themselves before others.

Have you ever seen a deer caught in the headlights? The deer just stands there, paralyzed with fear, staring into the lights of the car bearing down on them. Each man who wears the Medal of Honor is an exemplification of courage. They fear becoming the deer in the headlights and have devoted a large part of their lives making sure that never happened. They clearly understood and internalized the words of President Franklin D. Roosevelt, who said, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”

“Maureen, Daniel, John, Heather, Kathleen, Frank, Cathy, Colleen, Kelly, my dear friends in the Lord…When his father and mother named him Michael they invited into his life and purpose the mission of St. Michael the Archangel, who led the good angles to overcome the bad angles, led by those who thought they could match God Himself…At times like this we must remember that Michael has not disappeared–he has just gone ahead of us to prepare a place for us–that he would want us to smile through our tears–knowing that he is alive forever and loving us even more than when he was on earth.  We can do this if we remember each and every day these three simple things:  God loves us, God knows us, and God understands us.

God Loves Us:  The same God who created this world with a simple word–that Lord who could turn this world back into nothing–that God loves you.  He loved Michael and granted him, as He will welcome you when he calls you home, His eternal peace. He will not stop loving you–no matter if  you fail–because God is love.

God Knows Us:  He knows all Michael has done–his love for you,  God and country.  Michael’s love for Him and what he has offered to the Lord–knows what your needs are and will reach out to you in your loss and your love.

 God Understands Us: If I were to ask each one of you how you felt–each one would have a different answer and could say ‘you don’t understand’–but the Lord looks into your hearts and says ‘I understand, Finally I believe that if Michael could speak to you today he might say something like this,

To Those I Love and Those Who Love Me,

When I am gone, release me and let me go, I have so many things to see and do, you mustn’t tie yourself to me with tears.  Be happy that we had so many years.  I have you my love; you can only guess how much you gave me in happiness. I thank you for the love you have each shown. But, now it’s time I traveled on alone.  So, grieve awhile for me, if grieve you must. Then, let your grief be comforted by trust. It’s only for a while that we must be far away, for life goes on. So, if yo need me, call and I will come. Though you can’t see or touch me, I’ll be near.

And, if you listen with your heart you’ll hear, all my love around you soft and clear. And, then, when you must come this way alone, I’ll greet you with a smile and welcome you home.”

Many of us can remember back to our childhood and our local Memorial Day events of days gone by.  As Memorial Day 2011 approaches, I am reminded that as a young Cub Scout in Upper Sandusky, Ohio our duty began on the Tuesday before Memorial Day. At our weekly Den meeting our Den Mother would give us the history of Memorial Day and reminded us of our obligation to meet at the St. Paul Lutheran Church on Friday immediately after school in full uniform. Once at the church we were driven to the one of the local cemeteries to place flags at the graves of every veteran.

In the mid-60’s America was at war in a place called Viet Nam but to many of us in our small town, it was a place we could hardly pronounce and certainly knew nothing about. During the drive to the cemetery our scout leader reinforced the history of Memorial Day. Upon arrival at our destination, we were each given a six-inch wooden ruler and instructed to place the flag in the special flag holder donated by local organizations centered exactly six inches in from the headstone. After placing the flag properly we took two steps back and gave the Boy Scout hand salute. Scout leaders and senior scouts “supervised” to ensure that our duties were conducted accurately and reverently which meant absolutely no talking.  At the cemetery our leaders gave instructions in a hushed voice.    

On Memorial Day local police and fire department vehicles with their lights flashing and the occasional yelps of the sirens led the parade of county local high school bands, convertibles with former prisoners of war waving to cheering crowds and younger veterans marched smartly behind. Boy and Girl Scout troops followed by the cub scouts and brownie scouts made the annual pilgrimage that began at Neate’s automobile dealership.

To me, it looked like the entire town of 5,000 had lined the parade route that proceeded south on North Sandusky Avenue for one-half mile to the town square then turned left onto West Wyandot Avenue for one mile down the hill to the Harrison Smith Park and the Veterans Memorial.

Our Uncles Robert and Ivan served in World War II and my siblings and I knew that our father was a Korean War veteran, but none of us really understood its significance. Dad never marched in the parade nor did he ever talk about his military service. What we did understand was that we were reared with the near-reverent respect for those who wear and have worn the uniform of our nation—a lesson I have never forgotten.

This year marks the first anniversary of my father’s death, which makes this Memorial Day even more poignant. In addition to my large American flag proudly displayed daily, several additional smaller flags will be prominently displayed in flower urns on my front porch.

I will telephone Dan Murphy and Maureen Murphy, parents of LT Michael P. Murphy and let them know that they are in my thoughts and prayers and then make the 150-mile drive to Oak Hill Cemetery in Upper Sandusky and place a memorial wreath at my father’s grave; admire the American Flag in its bronze holder and most probably shed a tear or two as I remember those fond memories of him and of the Memorial Days long since passed. 

Throughout our national history, approximately 1 percent of each generation has answered the call to military service. They liberated Europe, defended people they had never met and countries they had never visited, and since September 2001 defended us against terrorist attacks here at home.

This Memorial Day, let us take a few minutes from our family gatherings to remember those who fill our national cemeteries here at home and those hundreds of thousands who repose in eternal rest in the foreign lands for which they fought.   

Let us keep “Memorial” in Memorial Day by remembering and following General John Logan’s General Order No. 11 issued on May 5, 1868, “…gather around their sacred remains and garland the passionless mounds above them with choicest flowers of springtime…let us in this solemn presence renew our pledges to aid and assist those whom they have left among us as sacred charges upon the Nation’s gratitude,–the soldier’s and sailor’s widow and orphan.”

Thanks Dad, and thank you to all those who defend freedom.

I am always amazed at how two people can look at the same glass of water and one sees it as half full and the other as half empty…and find it fascinating that two people can read the same words on a page and comprehend two totally different messages.

With the glass of water, it is neither half full nor half empty, it simply is what it is…all depending on your perspective. The words on the page are exactly the same for both readers; how the words are interpreted depends on the lens through which they are viewed.

Like many of you, I have found that for every individual who steps out from the crowd and attempts what many view as difficult, there are plenty of individuals who will stand back and laugh when the doer stumbles, carp when they speak, and scoff when they write. Any doer has been “tested” by these critics.   

Theodore Roosevelt, 26th President of the United States had this to say about the critic in his “Man in the Arena” speech delivered April 23, 1910.

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.”

While researching and writing SEAL of Honor I learned from the life and wisdom of Michael Murphy that the major value in life is not what you get. The major value in life is what you become. 

Last weekend was a great tribute to a fallen warrior–LT Michael Murphy, however; it was so much more than that. As Maureen Murphy, LT Murphy’s mother and ship’s sponsor so appropriately noted in her remarks, “even though the ship will bear Michael’s name, it will carry the spirit of all 19 of those those boys killed in Operation Red Wings.”

All to often, I think we honor an individual to such an extent that we tend to forget about those who trained and fought with them and most importantly, supported them. The fact is, hundreds of individuals help produce the warriors that were on that mountain in June 2005. Hundreds if not thousands of individuals came together in a united cause that prepared those men for that mission. In any endeavor, successful or not, there are many people who work behind the scenes to make sure the equipment is ordered, correctly assembled, available when and where it is needed, coordinate and transport where and when needed that never get recognized and are seldom acknowledged.

That is certainly the case with any military mission. Our Special Operations forces are best best of the best, are at the very tip of the spear when it comes to inflicting maximum damage to those who would do us harm.  With that training, education and experience comes a certain degree of confidence; confidence in the fact that you are the best trained and best equipped warriors in the history of warfare.

As I stated in SEAL of Honor, fortunately “there is a difference between confidence and conceit,  commitment and convienence, and character and contrition. It is the SEAL’s fundamental difference in thought process and attitude that provides them with confidence, commitment, and character. Thankfully, conceit, convenience, and contrition simply do not apply to the warrior community.”

“SEAL’s are not maniacal individuals hell-bent on self-destruction.  They have hopes and dreams for themselves and their families just like each of us do…SEALs are acutely aware that freedom is not free.  They understand better than most that everything has a price that must be paid…SEALs give all and ask for nothing. Their reward is coming home to their families and friends, watching them and others enjoy the freedoms they helped secure, ever vigilant that for as long as the Lord tarries, the fight is never complete.”

The next time we hear of a great military achievement, let us remember all those unsung heroes behind the scenes that made it possible for those out front to get the job done. And when we learn of the death of one or more of our warriors, let us mourn their loss, our loss, but let us not concentrate how these warriors died, but celebrate how they lived.

Dan Murphy was a guest on today’s Fox & Friends and author Gary Williams was interviewed by Brian Thomas on 55KRC.  Dan will be a guest on the Michael Smerconish Show in Philadelphia on Friday, May 13, 2011.

We have over 100 christening photographs with many more to come up on Flickr.  See the link on the SEAL of Honor FB page.

I was one of about 75 invited guests to have the opportunity to join former SECNAV Dr. Donald Winter as he spoke to the Casco Bay Navy League regarding the process involved of naming of U.S. Navy ships. Holding a Ph. D. in physics, Dr. Winter served as the 74th Secretary of the Navy under President George W. Bush and is one of the most personable and genuine people I have ever met. Dr. Winter wrote a heartfelt endorsement for SEAL of Honor and I am honored to call him a friend. 

Placing a coin at the step, or base, of the mast of a newly constructed ship is a custom still retained as wooden ships have become steel. This tradition during ship building had its origin with the ancient Greeks and Romans. As legend has it upon dying, it was customary to place coins in the mouths of the dead in the belief that this would ensure payment to Charon for ferry passage across the River Styx and into the afterlife. Because of this, when ships were sent off to battle, enough money was placed in the bottom of the mast to ensure the entire crew had enough money to pay Charon for passage in the event they did not return. As a navy, being steeped in customs and traditions the ritual has survived. The coins are placed in the mast today but now represent and symbolize certain aspects of the ship’s birth and a gesture of safe passage for the crew.

The Michael Murphy’s mast box contains the following items:

• Three United States Quarters to represent:

• One United States Dime (2000) to represent the year LT Murphy was commissioned as a United States Naval Officer.
• One United States Nickle (2002) to represent the year that LT Muprhy attained his SEAL qualification.
• Twenty United States Pennies to represent the birth year of each of the members of Operation Red Wings.
• One United States Penny to represent the birth year of Ms. Maureen Murphy, LT Murphy’s mother
• One United States Penny to represent the birth year of Mr. Daniel Murphy, LT Murphy’s father.

The coin denominations sum is 112 and represents the ship’s hull number. Additionally there are a nuymber of commerative coins and memorabelia in the Mast Stepping box.

LT Michael Murphy was all about TEAM.  That is why the longest chapter in SEAL of Honor:  Operation Red Wings and the Life of LT Michael P. Murphy, USN is about all 19 of those of our Navy SEALs and Army Nightstalkers KIA on June 28, 2005…and all 19 initials are welded into the keel-plate of the USS Michael Murphy.